it's that time of year again

finals!

this is last week:

and this is this week:

and that is why I am too busy for writing,

though everything is still shipshape

here on the good ship gypsy.

I mean ... a real post!

sorry, that last post was kind of a tweet, but I'm burned out on twitter.

I never saw twitter as a way to network with people. I didn't even really see it as a forum for saying things to people. it was just a way to 1) say witty things, 2) express frustrations, and 3) make dry observations about my surroundings. and now twitter has become annoying. so I still use it for those things myself, but I don't much care if anyone ever reads them - I just wanted to say them - and I don't ever read what anyone else says anymore. appealing colors and design can only go so far. and the momentile website is actually witty - why can't twitter be witty? I guess because they're leaving it up to the tweeters to be witty. hmm. exactly.

also, I felt bad for writing such a tiny post, seeing as I haven't posted in ... awhile.

thanksgiving happened. I went to utah to be with andy for five whole days! it was lovely, even when we got the stomach flu. we got to visit lots of family. and spend absolutely as much time together as possible. we took a long nap every day - and I tell you what, a nap a day is so good for you. I would try to convert you all more vigorously, but I don't do it myself either - only on vacation. sigh.

my camera battery was dead the whole time. sorry. I thought of taking pictures on my phone once, but ... I was lazy.

stress is at a high. my car is in the shop. my job is consequently up in the air. my other job is miserable. I miss my boyfriend. and the buses hate me.

but things could actually be worse. a lot worse. so I'm okay.

and andy got the pixar internship!!! which is THE BEST THING EVER and it means I get to visit him in san francisco, which is also amazing :)

only one more week.

p.s. trader joe's is amazing (and so is etsy)

a retrospective on byu computer labs

they were much better than here

much much better

labs round 2

I don't remember if I mentioned this, but I am finally no longer unemployed. I have two jobs.

for one, I am a personal care associate doing home care for the elderly through Country Meadows Retirement Communities. I wrap up a lengthy round of vaccinations, TB tests, and training tomorrow with my last floor training day. it's really quite an interesting job :)

for two, I'm working in the Pitt campus computer labs ... yeah, I know - again. but it pays (though not well at all) and any money I can make in the additional hours I have will help. I get paid much better doing home care, so I'll only fill in other times of the day with lab hours when it's convenient. i.e. I won't be jumping through hoops to fill shifts in the labs, only pick them up when it works, and keep my permanent weekly shifts pretty low, maybe 8 to 10 hours a week.

so, here I sit, in the computer labs, alphabetizing print jobs.
it's a good thing I like paper :)

one two buckle my shoe

1

the momma visits in pittsburgh

the yarn store!

2

one of those times driving home

3

home with the little bros

I saw the inside of gregory's closet

and cracked up at this neat little picture.

then he informed me that my dad did it.

which was even more hilarious and awesome :)

4

back home from home

yes, I took this picture while driving.

yes, I was being safe (mostly).

yes, I am that amazing.

5

in utah for halloween weekend!

my niece, the little boy in the reluctant dragon

and my seester :)

mariposa!

wore this to the hall family pumpkin carving

where I won a brand.new.touch.screen.8g.ipod.nano

in the door prize drawing

?!?!?!?

for the win :)

I love having adventures.

I am getting a little tired of flying, though :/

I'll be glad for andy to come out here, for once.

but first! thanksgiving

oh how I love thanksgiving

let the gratitude posts begin.

saint simon

so this one time, a couple of days ago, I had a horrible 80s hit stuck in my head (that got put there while we were buying drinks at smith's) so andy sang bits of the shins songs to me while we drove back to the flsr and holy crap I had forgotten how much I freaking LOVE the shins and now I can't stop listening to them again :)

saint simon is my favorite:

mariposa! that's me!

more vermont

at the joseph smith birthplace

ha - this is a great andy face

I like our shoes :)

thanks, lil, for the photos

my grandpa

my grandpa is very sick

and this makes me sad.

I love him so much.

rollercoaster days. goodness.

scruff is versatile!

this is a good lookin' guy.

but does this look like a folk music artist to you?

especially one with a name like sufjan

and who's friends with daniel johnston?

no, I didn't think so, either.

we're getting there.

and he's in a thrift store.

this is a good sign.

there we go! much better

unfortunately, the top picture is the most recent.

look what fame has done to him.

it has turned him into a stud.

and the only reason he doesn't spend more time

on his hair than on his music

is because he cut it all off.

tsk tsk sufjan.

how could you let the medias get to you?

I bet you played your banjo much better

when you looked like a fool.

the only constant factor in these pictures

is the presence of scruff.

boys, learn this lesson well.

scruff is versatile!

good things regardless

hmm. unexpectedly long weekend at home. I drove up on friday to go to the temple to do baptisms (I try to go once a month) and intended to drive straight home on saturday afternoon. turns out my grandpa is really sick and I stayed through monday morning to take care of my brothers so m y dad could fly out to utah to be with my grandpa (my mom was already out there for a pleasure visit).

hmm. unexpectedly difficult, emotional weekend. I didn't quite realize before how an emotional stress about one thing comes out in just about every other thing, without even realizing it's happening.

but here are some good things, regardless:

- jeffrey's excitement about things and his laugh are completely delightful and adorable.

- me and jeffrey and gregory have a really fun time together - we are total goofs and I love it.

- brother houghton was going to give me a mandolin, but then it was broken, but still! he was going to give me a mandolin!

- the drive from pitt to home by way of west virginia was gorgeous. the drive from home to pitt by the turnpike was also so gorgeous. I LOVE THIS TIME OF YEAR.

- emotional crisis always ends in peace and comfort and joy from the Lord, which is a good thing, because otherwise I would never let myself feel things and then I would be clinically insane.

- I have a halloween costume. I am excited to wear it :)

- I fly to utah in 1 day !! because you don't count today and you don't count the day you get there, so ... one day :)

I will take pictures - I promise!

and soon I'll put up my pics from last weekend when my momma came to visit. that was fun :)

iphone love

yay! the pictures that other people took in vermont

are starting to roll in.

iphone love :)

way of life

so, I haven't been overly concerned with my grades, so far. probably because I'm practicing an overall less-anxious way of living. I do my homework, I do my readings, I study (ish) for quizzes and tests. but I haven't had a lot of grade feedback yet, except for homeworks, which aren't very important.

however, I had a week of testiness right after I got back from vermont where I made up a stats quiz and an econ exam from while I was gone and took a global governance test (3 straight hours of writing - I've never had writer's cramp so bad). I got instant feedback on the quiz - perfect score! and quick turnaround on the econ exam - A minus! and I got my global gov test back yesterday - 192/200 = A!! I was so excited - I was a little concerned with my last essay cause I ran out of time and pencil lead and it was just meh - but I totally got perfect marks on all of my essays :)

so, this is working out well :) I study hard because I like to learn and don't worry about the things that are not actually important (grades) and I do well. I like this a lot.

procrastination is still ... something I'm working on.

whimsy

the people over at the curiosity shoppe know what's what:

"If an apple a day keeps the doctor away,

imagine what an apple a day IN A SWEATER can do!"

this is the most logical thing I have heard in a long time.

how do they know me so well?

the abominable charles christopher is ... apt:

(bigger)

I think it is high time I learned how to make cake pops.

they're cute. and bite size.

and well, you know ... delicious.

I don't generally like this guy's fashion subjects

so why do I keep him in my feed, again?

perhaps because every once in awhile,

I stumble on things like this:

and ... um ...

WHAT??

I can has swedish vacation cottage??

if I had money, here's what I would do:

thing 1 - hop on a plane to provo (of all places)

thing 2 - buy flowers every week

thing 3 - get all of the awesome art prints

that I want to put in the house I don't have yet

thing 7 (because I like that number) -

buy lots and lots of pretty dresses

the end.

like comin' back home again

VERMONT!

well, I didn't take any pictures of the houses and only about 3 pictures of people during my whole trip and none of them really turned out, so you'll just have to wait until the bajillion photographers who were there put something up for me to borrow :)

in the meantime, here are some things I did take pictures of:

the woodstock library

which was followed by a lovely stroll through town

and my only purchase of the entire trip - a $5 notebook, of course

the "grand canyon" of the east

essentially a pretty gorge

that was actually much deeper and prettier than it appears here

a view of the lake

a bit behind the snapdragon inn

which was a fantastic place

I want to go back and stay there !!

and you should come too !

no, seriously, it's an amazing bed & breakfast

in beautiful vermont.

everyone should go.

we missed the full leaf change by a few weeks, I think

but it was still incredibly beautiful.

and romantic.

it. was. SO. wonderful. to see andy.

the wedding was perfect - rob & leilani were so happy

and so everyone else was too

I am so so glad I could go

~

this isn't vermont.

this is just me and totoro :)

fools

um ... friends. this is good stuff.

back in a jiffy

the countdown has FINALLY ended!

andy is on his flight

I leave tomorrow on the 28x flyer

(bus to the airport)

at 6.20 in the morning

and in only 14 hours

I will be with my boyfriend again

sigh :)

for a whole 4 long days

for a lovely weekend wedding

with andy's family

in vermont

beautiful beautiful vermont

at this place:

I promise I won't forget my camera this time

a dichotomy of things

I really like doing laundry

- I love the smell of fresh towels and shirts crisp from rack-drying and full armloads of clothes straight out of the dryer

- I love the clean feel of new sheets on my bed

- and dryer sheets. I love dryer sheets. and cleaning the lint out of the dryer filter.

I really don't like making beds

(that are situated against the wall)

- I don't think I've ever had a bed that hasn't had one edge against a wall and for a meticulous, methodical person like myself, I hate not being able to tuck the sheets the way I want to or get the corners neat in the one corner where you have to be on top of the mattress in order to get to it.

- if this is too complicated and I'm the only one who ever thinks about these things ... well ... they're important.

I really like cleaning mirrors with newspaper and vinegar

- I had kind of heard of this before but dismissed it because ... newspapers are dirty. dirty things cannot clean other things. sufficiently, that is. then, one cleaning check, we didn't have any windex or paper towels and lorien was like, here just use these, and I was like -_- okay ... and it totally worked, more amazingly than anything else. no streaks! and it smells like delicious vinegar! which reminds me of sweet and sour sauce! yum!

- in other words, I am totally converted. and cleaning mirrors no longer has to be an exercise in streak-control-obsessiveness because there are no streaks to worry about! and did I mention that vinegar is yummy?

I really don't like watering plants

- actually, I do. but I always forget to. so I feel like a plant killer. because I am. most of the time. for once I was finally keeping my plants alive and then I had to take them on a cross-country road trip and ... I survived. but they didn't.

- in short, one day I will manage to grow something and keep it alive. in the meantime, I have a black thumb :(

I really like crushed ice more than cubed ice

... there is nothing more to say

I really don't like not having a job

... again, there is nothing more to say.

and finally ...

I really really like this:

andy sent me a totoro. it is amazing :)

andy ga watashi ni ai shiteru kara watashi wa totoro atta

(spelling?)

ie. ie. wasureta?

sunday

I'm home for the weekend - yay!

do you ever get into a mode where you are seriously uncomfortable - headache, tired, starving, thirsty, etc. - but you don't do anything about it, even though you're miserable? that happens to me all the time, especially when I get a headache - it just seems counter-intuitive to take an advil. I don't know why.

I think sometimes it's because the physical discomfort seems to be a manifestation of your thoughts or your mood and there's a strange satisfaction that you are feeling both emotionally and physically at the same time, like your body is in on it too. and who am I to thwart such synchronization?

it's weird. it's like I don't want to feel better. there's a vindication in feeling it all to the fullest. this almost always hurts me more than anything else - like vindication always does - like when I ate all the rest of the pumpkin bars, waaaayyy more than I could/should actually eat, out of spite for the roommates who ate most of them when they weren't supposed to ...

sometimes I can be so juvenile. at least I'm not running a country or anything, like some of the juveniles we've got in this world. (this is not a stab at obama. this is a stab at all of them. international relations is like a themed birthday party for 5 year olds. "but I wanted the corner piece that had the blue flower on it and the YELLOW candle!!" "how come he gets more ice cream than me?" until it comes to outright hitting and stringing people up to be the pinata. this metaphor is rather ... extended.)

okay I'm done.

church was kind of bipolar today. my home ward is a freaking baby-making machine and sacrament meeting was so loud from the childrens that I almost couldn't hear the speakers. it was the sound of 20 fruit snack packages being opened at once, a host of fussy babies and cheerfully blabbering toddlers, and on up the ranks.

then sunday school was excellent - exactly what it should be and what it so often isn't. the teacher was there to bring the spirit and let the spirit teach the class members, and he did. it was amazing and edifying.

then everything kind of went back to hectic/crazy. I had to literally wade through hosts of small children in order to get out of the building.

I am literally broke and I hate being poor. it's not even about buying things - I don't need to buy things - it's about not being able to when I have to - it's about having a constant stress that maybe things aren't going to be okay.

also, I'm hungry and I miss my boyfriend. that most of all.

back to pittsburgh, home again home again jiggedy jig

shorn

I got a haircut! do you like it?

actually, don't answer that.

I like it. a lot :)

I just love love love short hair.

moving in

building furnitures with my momma

in my new room

the neighbor gato who was chilling on our windowsill one day

pretty much the sweetest cat ever

I played with it outside today

and it loved me to death.

see - I'm dead.

a sight I saw on my way to the shadyside art festival

a mural on maple street where the art festival was

I really had to resist taking pictures of some of the art

the artists probably wouldn't have minded, if I'd asked,

I sometimes have to remind myself that I'm not in france anymore

the package my new dress came in

courtesy of angela from seesaw vintage

the dress is perfect :)

I'm wearing it to andy's brother's vermont wedding

now I just need some awesome new shoes. sigh.

most recent puzzle accomplishment

the pieces were very strange shapes

which made it surprisingly difficult

~

"the bruises go away,

and so does how you hate,

and so does the feeling

that everything you receive from life

is something you have earned."

- everything is illuminated

~

~

I take pictures of trees, clouds & shadows.

also wildlife. and sculptures.

and myself. but I delete most of those.

beautiful

I was newly inspired by zina to catch up on my google reader, which has been stuck on a steady 700+ for far too long. and in the last couple of days, I've tackled that weighty number into a submissive 227. I admit there are some I don't really have an interest in anymore and I ought to just clean things out, but while I have renewed energy to read blogs, I don't have a renewed energy to re-evaluate my interest in them right now. so some I just mark as all read and move on. and some I re-discover and it's great :)

I ran across a blog* that I haven't had much interest in and still don't, but it contained a kind of treasure that I really needed right now. having a boyfriend who is all kinds of wonderful, he's always telling me how beautiful I am and I actually have a really hard time hearing it - there's a powerful internal resistance to accepting that I'm pretty and then I get all anxious ... anyway, I'm working on it, but these thoughts were just really important to me:

beautiful

adj.

having beauty; having qualities that give great pleasure or satisfaction to see, hear, think about, etc.; delighting the senses or mind; excellent of its kind; wonderful; very pleasing or satisfying; extraordinary; incredible

If there is something in you that is still trying to earn God's good graces, you have not accepted the greatest gift you have ever been offered: God's forgiveness and mercy.

you are more beautiful than you will ever know.

*thanks

vow.

slightly (un)settled

I am in pittsburgh

it is a lovely city

and I may not be in love with it yet

but already it feels like home

not everything is unpacked

but I built some furniture

and my clothes smell like pine wood

and my books are shelved

the bus isn't as reliable as I'd like

but the bus drivers are kind

and I can hop on pretty much any of them

and it'll get me home

I walked into my building on monday

and surrounded by students

along the halls

I felt like I belong

and already the faces appear

with smiles and questions

and I walk out of my way

to keep the conversation going

I eat toast with marmalade for brunch

because evening classes

and puzzles and phone calls

make for late mornings

when I walk the streets

I feel a kind of liberation

a lightness in the soles of my feet

and only you are missing

beirut is the soundtrack of this city

and my waking dreams are vivid

and I really need to get a job

so I'll be too busy to think of you so much

the happenings

timp cave

carried hazel all the way down

felt quite happily like backpacking

spike, mabel's pet hedgehog

REI joy

salt lake cathedral w/ andy

the chick chick chickies

roosting and looking so evil

baby zuri!

story forthcoming

my momma's so cute

lake michigan love