now is all there is

Years and years

of dreaming big,

of adults telling me that I will be

amazing.

Hours and hours

of writing, reading, playing

saying

     I'm going to be ---

           I'm going to do ---

                I'm going to go ---

what? where?

In a way, I don't care

anymore.

I've spent my life

planning, preparing.

over-bearing my mind.

after this, I'll do that

after that, then this

then what?

I know this life, only.

and I'm afraid I'll spend

hours planning and years waiting

for something that will never happen

because I didn't know that 

now is all there is.