many chairs on a ledge above a large gymnasium/hall. in front of the ledge is a row of mahogany wood or leather chairs with legs from the floor to the ledge, maybe 20 feet high. people in the chairs on the ledge. I'm pretty sure we're watching something but I don't know what it is. me and this guy from work named mckay are sitting in the crazy tall chairs next to each other. I need comforting for some reason, and I cuddle next to him, under his arm, and feel safe and calm.
there's a bar across the front of the chair so you don't fall out. I guess it's supposed to be safe, but it's really scary up there. we're trying to get out of our chairs, but it's really hard with the bar there. I'm pretty much hanging off the edge of it, but mckay pulls me up, and everything's good.
I'm not sure why I have so many dreams about boys saving me. I'm a pretty independent, feisty girl. whoever I end up with is going to have to understand the duality/paradox of my nature. I'm not sure I understand it myself.
I was thinking back to my kissing dreams. first, I had a kissing dream where some guy kissed me with tongue and I slapped him. but at least we kissed. the next two kissing dreams, I wanted to kiss the guy, but I suddenly ended up with food in my mouth. I think I'm just never going to eat food on dates ever. at least I want to be kissed now. oh yeah, I guess I did kiss that one guy later in the dream in that crazy castle narnia one. cool. that was a pretty sweet dream.
The breeze at dawn has things to tell you.
Don't go back to sleep.
You must ask for what you really want.
Don't go back to sleep.
People are going back and forth
across the doorsill
where the two worlds touch.
The door is round and open.
Don't go back to sleep.
Don't let your throat tighten
with fear. Take sips of breath
all day and night, before death
closes your mouth.
The morning wind spreads its fresh smell
We must get up and take that in,
the wind that lets us live.
Breathe before it's gone.
Dance, when you're broken open.
Dance, when you've torn the bandage off.
Dance in the middle of the fighting.
Dance in your blood.
Dance, when you're perfectly free.
(some Indian guy hundreds of years ago)
is this real? or has this been happening inside my head?
of course it's happening inside your head, harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?
oh dear. christina, i think that being independent is wonderful, and co-dependence is hazardous.
ReplyDeletei think that it's possible that you've grown so independent that you shut people out. so maybe these dreams mean that you need to open up a bit, be vulnerable, as scary as it is, sometimes is necessary.